Today I am dealing with my inadequacies as a husband. I stupidly did something [again] that hurt my wife. I can ask her to forgive me and ask the Lord to forgive me—but the fact remains that I hurt her emotionally and spiritually by being unwilling to take a husbandly stand and risk a confrontation. I was weak and it cost both of us. Often it is a simple matter of me being less than responsible, or snappy, or condescending. The truth is, I am often a mess as a leader, a protector, or a lover. Repentance is still a major part of my life.

Thank God He can fix it and we can go on.

The good news is that in our marriage with Jesus, we will find no flaw in Him. He is the perfect husband for us whom we can trust completely, serve with joy, and love without fear. Let’s look at Paul’s description of the husband.

Husbands love your wives, just as Jesus loved the church. He gave up his life for her to make her holy and clean, to be able to present her…holy and without sin. Husbands ought to love their wives as they love their own bodies. …No one hates his own body but feeds and cares for it… [Ephesians 5:25–30]

This is tightly paraphrased and condensed to make to basic principles more visible. Many teachings about marriage focus on the woman’s submission to the husband’s lordship. It is true that the wife is to submit to her husband in all things. But look at what is laid on the husband. Any woman would have little or no trouble submitting to a husband who acted like Jesus—a husband who gave up his life to serve, cherish, and nourish his wife. A husband who did everything necessary to make his wife pure, spotless, holy and clean. A husband who put his wife’s need first.

He was willing to do whatever it took…

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